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The Female Foster Carer Perspective

In spirit of International Women’s Day 2016 Five Rivers are proud to support and celebrate the social, economic, cultural and political achievement of women, including our own female foster carers.

In an interview with one of our talented female foster carers from Cornwall we found out what her thoughts were on all things fostering.

If somebody was thinking of fostering, what would you say to them?

I would say, ‘look around, look in your heart, look around. Have you got place? If you can say “Yes” to 6 questions, which are,

  1. Have you got the time
  2. Do you believe in children
  3. Do you believe in our future
  4. Do you want to make a difference
  5. Do you love making a difference
  6. Can you be real?

Then go for it, that’s how we do it.

 Did you foster previously?

No but my whole family did foster, all my sisters fostered.

Wow, so it’s been in the whole family

It’s kind of normality for us          

 If someone else was thinking about fostering, what would you say to them?

Definitely don’t go into it with a very gooey ‘I love all children, I want to nurture somebody’, it’s quite a skilled job, I would say it’s quite a profession, actually. You need to be knowledgeable, don’t just go into it thinking ‘I’m going to wrap my arms around this child’, it won’t be reciprocal.

You really need to have knowledge to be able to look after them, especially with attachment problems that they have and why they present such behaviour. If you have the theory behind why they’re doing, it enables you to cope with what they bring about in yourself, because your emotions are very difficult to handle sometimes. If you’ve got your own children, what attachment disorder children do to them is very clever and you have to be right on top of it all the time. Which can be quite exhausting, and that’s why we need respite.

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