Thursday 04 June 2026
Last updated: Monday 08 June 2026
Andy’s journey into fostering began years ago, sparked by an unexpected connection with a care experienced child while on holiday. That meeting stayed with him, planting a quiet seed in his heart, and he knew that one day, when he was ready, he would take the steps to become a Foster Carer. In this interview, Andy reflects on the role structure plays in raising children and how invaluable the ongoing training and support from Five Rivers has been throughout his experience.
I believe that children are our future and are particularly deserving of our attention and support. I am committed to investing in their growth and development, as I see them as vital to the world we want to cultivate.
I worked in the same building as Five Rivers, so I was aware of them; they had a stall in the building and after talking with the staff about fostering, I knew I had found the right agency.
It was the connection that I made with the whole family but especially the foster child. He had mental health issues and he and I connected. He would talk to me, and we would spend time together and play on the beach. When he was leaving, he told me that he needed somebody like me in his life and when he said that I thought that I should think about fostering.
The initial process to become a Foster Carer was easy, and it was almost like therapy; it taught me to reflect. I enjoyed that process so much and I found out so much about myself. We did the Skills to Foster course, and it was a really enlightening experience.
I’ve found Five Rivers very supportive. I struggled to make decisions in the early days, not knowing what to do when the child doesn’t want to go to school for example, but I’m lucky I now have the tools I need to support the children I care for.
The training is very important; I’ve learned so much from the training. It’s good to have, it’s like a coaching session and it makes me feel invigorated and confident in what I’m doing.
Knowledge is very important, especially when it comes to Attachment and Trauma Informed Care (ATIC TM) training. When we have our group support sessions, we spend a lot of time talking about specific things that our kids are going through, and you realise you are not alone, and it makes a big difference.
My Social Worker is very understanding. I have always felt very supported and they have helped me grow as a person. They always know when I’m struggling with something and help me. I have always felt supported; they honestly feel like a part of my family.
When I first decided to foster, my son who was living with me at the time, was very accepting of it. I must add that during that time my son was such a big part of my support team.
I took care of a young girl for a short break, and it was incredibly exciting, almost like having my own child again. I learned that it’s important to remain calm and to go at the child’s pace to avoid overwhelming her with my excitement.
It really solidified that I made the right choice in choosing to become a Foster Carer. Looking back, I definitely made the mistake of making it feel like a “fun holiday” I wasn’t concerned about structure so much, I just wanted them to have fun but now that is something I have worked hard on. It is important to remember that even though they seem happy with you, it doesn’t mean it is the right place for them. It highlighted the ‘honeymoon phase’ to me.
You win some battles and you lose some. I think being nurturing is so important. We learn and we talk, and I do have ground rules in place. My boys are good negotiators so the rules can sometimes change.
One of the most rewarding moments as a Foster Carer was when one of my boys asked me if he could call me “Dad,” that was amazing.
I find the things I have learned through training are the most valuable. Attachment and Trauma Informed Care (ATIC TM) training made me realise that care experienced children do not always know how to express themselves properly, like we would, which is why training like this is so important. Also, as part of your experience you find that other carers are going through the same things as you. When we meet up and talk about our experiences, you find you are not alone; someone else is going through it too.
Five Rivers have supported me right from the beginning, through to now, 9 years on. They have always shown that they are always there to support me, whether it is a little problem or a massive one. They are good at grounding me, and I feel like they understand me as a person. My Supervising Social Worker really knows me and sees me.
One of the hardest things is offering unconditional love and ensuring that it remains unwavering without expecting anything in return. Over the years, my knowledge has grown, and it has positively impacted my approach to children therapeutically.
Patience and also my ability not to drown, I have learnt not to be overwhelmed. There have been so many new experiences that I never had to deal with before fostering, and I have learnt that if you have any concerns about something, talk to someone. Your Supervising Social Worker is there to help you; I like to live my life like I’m in a fishbowl, everything out in the open.
I think it is important to share the realities of fostering, not just the positive aspects, and to remain patient and look after yourself in the process. Also, don’t panic and be prepared to adapt.
I wish I had known that I was going to be good at this. It is a confidence thing, I just wish I believed in myself like I do now, then.
Discover Andy’s journey and how it shaped where he is now.
If you’re inspired by Andy’s story, contact our friendly Carer Enquiries team today for an informal chat about becoming a Foster Carer.
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